Love At First Thought

I CAN’T WAIT to meet you. I’m so excited about your arrival and it makes me so emotional… My best friend’s baby girl, the first-born of someone I remember meeting at 13 in our school library. I remembered getting introduced to your mom and thinking she was very beautiful and outgoing and nice and it intimidated shy, wallflower, nothing special me, as my best friend then used to be her best friend. I was terrified of being replaced.

Little did I know the two of us would actually grow closer together, closer than she is with your soon-to-be-aunt, and we would end up  stopping being able to put up with our first friend anymore.

There is not a single thing, a single subject we can’t talk about. Even several countries apart, we’re closer than many friends that live half-an-hour from me.

Back then, sitting in those cushions in the school library, I could never have dreamt that one day I would be her first baby’s godmother.

We’ve been through so much together, she’s like a sister to me and just  the thought of holding you, her baby in my arms thrills me and touches me to the brink of tears. I know I will cry when I see you for the first time. Just as you are a new beginning in her life, a doorway to a whole new lifestyle, responsibilities, joys and chores, I feel like you are in mine, too. My second, important step into adulthood.

You will teach me further about putting others before myself, about taking responsibility for another life. I can’t wait to hold you in my arms, even change your diapers and try to make you stop crying. Bargaining, babysitting, trying to appease tantrums, singing baby songs and reading stories. I look forward to showing you many things about the world, watching you grow into a small human being, talk to you and hear you ask me questions and things. I feel like my heart has swelled with love and I finally have someone to direct it to, someone to be the cradled in that love.

You’re not even born and I love you SO MUCH already.

Please arrive safely, I can’t wait to have you in my arms.

Much love,

your soon-to-be Godmother/aunt.

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~ by 1cellinthesea on January 19, 2013.

One Response to “Love At First Thought”

  1. […] found a friend, the one that introduced me to one of the best friendships I’ve discovered. You were always complaining about her and I felt bad. I was truly a […]

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